Hello and welcome to Bite-size History; a blog that trawls the depths of history for a delectable tale, quote or factoid that is served to you on a small yet respectably sized plate.

Long before dogs of the bipedal nature were frequenting bars and brothels, it seems that it was the quadrupedal variety that were doing the trendsetting 4000 years earlier in ancient Sumer. One of the oldest known jokes in the world happens to be about a Sumerian dog entering a tavern, recorded on clay tablets found in the city of Nippur.

“A dog entered a tavern and said: “I can’t see a thing. I’ll open this one!”

Once you’ve cleaned up the drink you sprayed all over your screen and regained your composure, you might discover that in the years between you reading this and when this dog’s mischievous adventure was chiseled into stone, the meaning has long since fallen between the cracks. A number of theories have been posited to try and unravel the mystery of what this four-legged fiend was referring to when it said, ‘I’ll open this one!’. An eye, perhaps? A door? We don’t know, and we probably aren’t alone in that regard.

It is likely that by the time this joke was recorded by Babylonians, Sumerian had long since ceased to be a living language spoken by the ancient Mesopotamians. Perhaps the Babylonians also struggled to understand what this crafty dog was up to all those years ago or nervously laughed and pretended like they understood it in front of their priestly peers. The context is long gone, but perhaps one day as more cuneiform tablets are discovered and translated and our understanding of Sumerian culture, we can finally put the mystery behind us.